negative thoughts

relationships are the most confusing thing ever. 

i don't know what to do.

i mean, i really care for this guy but at the same time, i am scared what if it does not work again. what if my family does not like him. i am not brave enough to take chances and risks. 

my mind is constantly full of negative thoughts of us that i cannot tell anyone because:

1. people will think i am a crazy erratic bitch ( which is true up to 80%)
2. people do not understand
3. i am an anxious super girl

haih.

i do not want to be together with him because of these but i still want him to be around.

we have been fighting because whenever i have negative thoughts, i just revert to my own bubble and it annoys him.

and when he is angry, he loses controls of his words and tones.

and i get hurt

and things become sour on the next day.

and the negative thinking kicks in.

it is a vicious cycle

who said relationships are fun is clearly in a relationship with him/herself.