the one

have you ever wondered when and where you are going to meet the guy who is going to be your 'the one'?

please take note that i am aware that life is not a fairytale and my 'the one' will not be a guy with a colgate smile and a bouquet of flowers in his hand.

but i always think about this whenever i am alone. my housemates all have boyfriends and i don't. my sister has a boyfriend. my best friends all have boyfriends. my brother has an on-off girlfriend. sometimes i wonder whether i am really weird and ugly that i always attract the wrong guys. and these anxieties of mine have caused me to jump into attractions with guys rather fast just to watch how these guys are actually never going to make me happy in the long run.

sometimes i tell myself, if i eat healthy enough, lose significant amount of weight, wear nice clothes and become a doctor then 'the one' will come.

i want someone to be able to give me that sense of security, tell me that everything is going to be alright regardless.