rain in the desert

maybe i am wishing for rain to happen in the desert

that's why i am listening to ron pope's song. a drop in the ocean. listen to it. beautiful lyrics.

call me stupid. an over-reacting stupid person.

but the heart does not want to agree with the brain.

nothing makes me feel better. not even the triumph of losing 3kgs just like that. out of no where.

i need you. but i don't want to need you. i want us to go our own separate ways. cos, i said before, we are too dangerous to be together. we love and hurt each other.

i dreamed of you last night. 

it's not funny.

after the long-sought sleep i finally managed to get, i got you as a bonus.

don't know if should be happy or pissed. 

blogging makes me sane. for some weird reasons. i feel like i am talking to someone even though i know i am not. 

sometimes i wish you're reading this. my blog. so that it would be easier for you to understand me. i am not a vocal person like you. i am like this. i have this side to me that i don't even understand about myself. 

but again, i should have put more effort as well.

i don't know whether it's too late or not. 

i don't know what i want. i am a fucking confused soul.

but i know it's not too late to study for my upcoming final exam.

so yea.

i hope you do well too S.