Life has to go on

S

I don't know how I am supposed to start.

We tried yet we did not make it. We were crushed. 

I understand if you want to bitch about me. It is perfectly humane to do so.

So, please understand if i do the same thing.

I know you most probably are never going to read this. Nonetheless I am still going to write it down

You were an amazing friend with amazing sense of humor. You have an amazing family that loves you and looks up on you. With your dominant personality, many people are keen to be your friends, including me.

We went from friends to romance. It was all beautiful. Rainbows and unicorns. not roses, but jasmine for me :-)

but things happened. and we can't cope with it

my mom
studies
life
religion
different views regarding life
unbridgeable differences

we tried and got hurt. still did not work
 
Now, we both know that you need someone that's unlike me.

You need someone who is ready for something more serious.
You need someone who can dedicate 80% of her time for you.
You need someone who's willing to give up her shorts for you.
You need someone who does not mind gaining pounds for you.
You need someone who can score even without studying.

I can't be that someone.

I tried. But i can't

I am 19. turning 20. still figuring out who I am.

thanks to you. now i know myself more. i understand myself more. i realized what i want and don't want in life. 

i appreciate small things that make me happy these days.

i miss you. and seeing the stuffed animal you gave me still makes me tear up these nights. but life has to go on, sooner or later. K. the girl you have been hanging out with seems to be a good girl. i can picture you together with her. whoever your spouse is in the future, i hope she makes you happy.

thank you

good bye